'RHBH' Star Teddi Mellencamp Says 80-Pound Weight Loss Occurred After She Quit Fad Diets

"Congratulations! You're officially a pizza VIP!" I stood in the doorway, confused. First, why was the pizza delivery man congratulating me? And second, what was a pizza VIP? At 19 years old, I'd lived in California for two years and seen some strange things, but this was a new one. Then he explained it: "You've ordered over 100 pizzas in one year!" I did the math: That was almost one pizza every three days. I'd also gained 80 pounds in one year.

Oh. Suddenly I didn't feel like celebrating anymore. Or eating pizza.

I wasn't always this way. Growing up, I was a nationally ranked equestrian. I spent a lot of time being active, which allowed me to disguise my poor eating habits. That all changed when, at 17, I moved to California to work for the Creative Artists Agency, one of the top talent agencies in LA. Work became my life. I spent a lot of time sitting, and because I kept the same bad habits around food, I quickly gained a lot of weight. I knew it was a problem but I had no idea how to fix it.

Over the next 10 years I tried every fad diet that hit LA—and believe me, that's a lot of weird diets.

I did everything from cleanses to the cookie diet. I even did the HCG diet, which involved getting weekly injections of what I hoped was actually HCG (human chorionic gonadotropin hormone), which supposedly would help boost my metabolism so I could lose weight quicker.

To be truthful, some of the diets did actually work. I lost weight, although it wasn't in a healthy way, and I had to keep jumping from one crazy, restrictive plan to the next to keep it off.

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By the time I hit 26 years old, I realized I needed to get my head out of the LA game and spend more time in my happy place: riding horses professionally. I got so absorbed that I spent hours and hours riding, often forgetting to eat or grabbing just a small snack on the run. My weight went down, but again, it wasn't necessarily healthy.

Then I met Edwin and my whole life changed. We were married in 2009 and my focus turned to him and starting our family together. From 2012 to 2014, I went through many infertility treatments, and had several miscarriages and two very difficult pregnancies, one of which had me on bed rest. During this time my weight was my last concern and sometimes I turned to food for comfort. I got my miracles and ended up with two beautiful children, my daughter Slate and my son Cruz. But in the process of finding them, I'd lost myself.

Teddi Mellencamp weight loss

Many days, motherhood left me overcome with anxiety. I would deal with it by eating junk food after the kids went to bed.

I wasn't sure who I was anymore beyond "Mommy." Ten months after Cruz was born, I took the kids on a field trip with friends to see some trains. We commemorated the fun day with a picture of all of us. As soon as I saw the photo, I was mortified. I knew that my body had changed, but it wasn't until I saw the stark reality of myself in that unforgiving photo that it really hit me how much. I didn't recognize that woman. It wasn't just my body; I'd lost the spark in my eyes, the effortless joy I'd had riding horses.

I was determined to find that woman—the person I really was—again, and for the first time I was willing to do whatever it took. In that moment I made a commitment to myself to not just lose the extra weight, but to focus on getting truly healthy, mentally and physically.

I didn't tell anyone about my goal at first, not even my husband. I knew this was something I had to do just for myself.

I started an Instagram dedicated to my fitness journey and posted about all the different workouts I tried. I had a blast, learning to love lots of types of exercise and making new friends. But after one year I'd only lost about 25 pounds. I wasn't upset about it—I felt better mentally and stronger physically—but I knew I could do better. It was time to deal with my nutrition… or lack thereof.

This meant the very difficult task of getting my anxiety under control. My food and my feelings often went together and step one was separating the two. I started to talk about it on my Instagram, being completely open and honest about all my struggles. I was blown away by the support I got from other women.

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I learned to head off my anxiety by setting aside an hour every Sunday night to make a detailed schedule; when I know what to expect, I stop worrying about it. I learned to wake up before my kids for some precious alone time, to write down three things I am grateful for every day, to make a short to-do list and prioritize the hardest stuff first. Learning how to stop procrastinating and deal with difficult things head on did wonders for banishing the looming cloud of anxiety that had been hanging over me for years. I no longer needed to eat junk food at night to deal with my feelings.

The second step was figuring out what good nutrition actually was. There's so much information out there about what to eat and what not to eat that I decided I was going to have to experiment on myself. I read the research and tried different healthy foods until I figured out a way to eat that made my body feel its best. I lost over 50 pounds in the next six months! I finally got back to a body I felt comfortable in and this time I was healthy.

But just as soon as I felt stable, life threw me another curveball. In 2017, I made the huge decision to join the cast of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills.

Not only was I going to have to maintain my healthy habits, but I'd have to also do with millions of people watching me.

Now, anyone who has seen the show knows that sometimes food and drinks flow freely. Did that make me a little nervous? Sure! So a huge part of maintaining my healthy lifestyle through it all was to make sure to be diligent about returning to my daily exercise and healthy eating habits whenever we were not filming. This is important to me because I am the only one who gets to decide what I want my body to look like and what I need to do to take care of it.

I've had a lot of people tell me that losing weight and keeping it off is easier for celebrities. And I hear that, I do! Some of the women on the show do take advantage of personal chefs, trainers that come to their home, nannies who watch their kids so they can exercise, and other health luxuries that money can buy—and there's nothing wrong with that. But I knew that unless I got healthy for myself, by myself, I'd never learn the tools I'd need to make it a lifestyle instead of just another diet.

So here's my celebrity diet secret: You don't need to be rich to get healthy.

You don't need to spend much money at all (shocker!). I didn't, and I was able to lose 80 pounds. Walking, running, or hiking is just as good a workout as a cardio class at a fancy gym and they're free. The healthiest meals are often the simplest meals: A good carb, a healthy fat, some protein, and veggies are really all you need. You don't need to be a chef, much less hire one!

Actually, the most important thing you need to get healthy is something you can't buy: commitment.

Another question I get a lot is, "how do you stay motivated?" My answer: I don't! Motivation is relying on external things to make you change; commitment is an internal decision. Once you commit to your goal, you'll stick with it because you want to change, not because you're forced to or because you feel guilty.

But isn't it easy to break a commitment to yourself when you're the only one who knows you made it? It is, which is why I always tell people that commitment only works with accountability. That was what my Instagram gave me—I could be open and honest about my struggles and goals and people would hold me accountable for that. I knew they were checking in on me and that made all the difference when I was feeling weak. In fact, it was such a great tool that it's the reason I started my company All In. I want to give every woman that system of commitment and 24/7 accountability that will help them be successful with their health goals.

Bodies are such a personal thing, and you're the only person who really knows yours.

Getting healthy is about finding a way to honor and love that body through good nutrition and daily movement—and that's a decision only you can make. Don't get taken in by the TV myth that it's easier for everyone else but you, or that if you just had millions of dollars, you'd have the perfect body.

Money can't buy determination and grit. And when you're ready to go all in, you'll know it. And you'll be amazing.